Monday, February 6, 2012

The First Bite of Many

Zach had his first surgery which included 5 procedures:

1. Muscle biopsy = The one that may give us a diagnosis.

2. G-tube placement = Now we are officially "Special Needs"

3. Nissen Wrap Fundoplication= I just learned to pronounce it!

4. Hernia= One less thing to worry about.

5. Circumcision= Freebie / You might as well since we're at it.

My baby was brave and strong as usual, no surprise there. The real surprise is how calmed we were while we were waiting since God literally held me and David by the hand all the time. When we got to the NICU, a volunteer from our church was there waiting to pray for us, then Josh and Denise dear friends from our bible study group came to bring us breakfast and keep us company for the two and a half hours that the surgery lasted, my mom in Colombia went to the church early to pray for Zach, tons of people "liked" our status and commented on Facebook and last thing we know, everything was said and done and our boy was recovering and waking up. Big praise there!

Now I'm left with mixed emotions regarding the G-tube. On the positive side, we are a step closer to take Zach home and we will be able to finally see his face "tube free", but I'm sad because now he has a hole in his tummy, he may not be able to taste food for a loong time, I will not be able to breastfeed and know how that feels like. I think that we both have been cheated when it comes to bonding, and I know that we're missing out: cuddling time, being silly time, giving him a bath time, going to places and bragging about my baby time. However, if we are able to get his  feedings set we will be able to bring him home, to move on with our lives and to finally have cute pictures for birth announcements of the three of us without a NICU background. Is that reaally too much to ask?

Anyway, I am grateful for all the support that we had, for the chance to kiss his G-tube free belly one last time before the surgery, for having David next to me all the time and because we were able to go with Zach to the elevator and join him on his "field trip" until the very minute that they took him into the operating room. David and I held each other's hands and cried after they took him, and I knew that it will be the first surgery of many more to come, the elephant is a tiny bit smaller since we took the first bite...of many.

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